You Know

You Know

By

Nathan Caleb Camerer

You know what I thought when we died?

I couldn’t understand how you could talk to people again

I couldn’t understand how you could laugh again

I couldn’t understand how you could play again

It’s a lie that life just goes on

Slow down, slow down, slow down, just slow down

Take it easy, take it easy

How am I supposed to take it easy?

I can’t just go on with my life like you

I am paralyzed

I’m an amputee

Do you see that?

Do you see who you are to me?

I just want to disappear

I feel like I’m visiting death’s waiting room

The Earth turned to bring us closer to each other

It turned on itself to bring us closer

It turned and brought us closer together

That was just a dream

Nothing I can do, will bring us back

How many lives do we live?

How many times do we die?

I’ve used them all for you

At the exact moment of death we all lose 21 grams, so they say

Everyone does

How much life fits into 21 grams?

How much life is lost?

21 grams is the weight of five stacks of nickels

A hummingbird weighs 21 grams

We lived a fraud long enough

Life goes on, with or without you

Life goes on, with or without God

God knows when a single hair moves on your head

Who will be next?

Who will be my replacement?

Lucky #13

You love to fight, but will you fight for love?

We’ve been a fraud for a long time and I can’t keep going on like this

Trying to put a Band-Aid on something that’s been bled dry

Condemning myself to a terrible death

My heart won’t work anymore

I’m dying of asphyxiation

It’s awful

You can’t imagine it

You could help me die better,

But you’re not going to do that

Easier to find a new love than to keep an old one

I know who you are

I love you

I love everything about you that it hurts

I fell in love with you

Did I have a choice?

Was there was a moment when I did have a choice?

Was there a moment when I could have resisted you?

I love you like a dog loves its owner

Can you love me for doing so?

Will you ever forgive me?

I forgave you

Without forgiveness we are just savages

I’m drowning

I’m disgusting

Can anyone ever love you as much as I do?

Why isn’t love enough?

You’re phenomenal

You’re so clever

You owe me for deceiving me so exquisitely

We weren’t happy

You don’t love me anymore

Goodbye

I owe you an apology for falling in love with you

I never intended for you to suffer

If I love you I will let you go so you can be happy

Do you want to be happy?

Do you know what makes you happy?

Tell me something true, even if it hurts

I don’t want to lie, but the truth is it’s over

You’re so disarming

You’re the princess and I’m the toad

Love isn’t simple

The heart isn’t a simple diagram

The heart is a fist wrapped in blood

I’m a writer

I’m a liar

I’m a cheater

I hoped you’d never stop loving me

I saw it draining out of you

I did a stupid thing

Where was the love?

I couldn’t see it

I couldn’t touch it

I couldn’t feel it

I couldn’t hear it

Without compromise, there is no love

You’ve ruined my life

I’ll get over it

Not as fast as you do

Why isn’t love enough?

I’ll always love you

I hate that I hurt you

Look me in the eyes and tell me you’re not still in love with me

The truth isn’t that great

I’m going to try lying for a change

I’m not in love with you anymore

I just lied