One

One

By

Nathan Caleb Camerer

The Lizard King said, “the West is the best”

He also said, “Adolf Hitler is alive and well and living in Miami”

I agree with both those statements,

But I do love Florida

I’m like a 49er though

I had one moment and I think I squandered it

My pot of gold slipped thru my fingers, I think

There was one play I could have made,

But I didn’t make it far enough

One quarter of my life I devote to you

One half of my life is promised to you

There’s one game we all play and it’s called ‘life’

Bumping and grinding our way to the one goal

The one goal we all share

Finish the game

Try and end up better at the end than you were at the beginning

Run blind towards that sunset

Dream like it’s 1849

Your pot of gold is out there

Don’t be afraid to work for it

Defend it

We all deserve our pot of gold

There Was A Time... (Part 2)

There Was A Time… (Part 2)

By

Nathan Caleb Camerer

There was a time when I made I great mistake

It was my great mistake to fall in love

I might recover

I might still be a great man,

But I need to forget what I lost

Everything is so confused

We loved each other

In my heart I believe that we loved each other

There was a time when I thought we would love each for all time,

But love isn’t enough for you

There are things that neither of us can forget

I’ll never say I didn’t love you

It wouldn’t be true,

But that doesn’t matter to you

I’m different from you

We were born into different worlds

There’s nothing I can say,

Nothing I can do or steal,

There’s nothing I can dream that will change that

I’m withdrawing further into myself

The flirtation is over

The novelty has worn off

There was a time when the thought of a decade of loneliness was foreign to me

There was a time when I dreaded the stroke of 30

It was a high point though,

But that high has faded

There was a time when we made plans to go away together

There was a time when we didn’t think things through

Acting on impulse

Now I’m empty

There was a time when I thought I had found a gift

A gift in you that I had never found in someone else

There was a time when I realized how extraordinary a nice girl could be

I’ll never find that again

There was a time when I was trying to figure out how we could be married

Struggling on a few dollars a month

Struggling until we made something of ourselves

There was time when the days became just an endless drill

Endlessly trying to not piss you off

There was a time when there was nothing I could say

Not even flowers would change things

There was a time when you were my shimmering, golden mirage

There was a time when I thought it would always be like that

There was a time when you were perfect

There was time when you were irresistible,

But it was only my imagination

There was a time when the moon seemed to rise higher because you were near

As I stand here, brooding on the unknown world before me,

I feel old

There was a time when I had a dream

It was so close that I thought I had a firm grasp on it,

But that’s behind me now

The future is before me

Year by year recedes into my memories

The dream continues to elude me,

But it doesn’t matter

Tomorrow I will run faster

Tomorrow I will stretch my arms out further

There will be a time on one fine morning

One morning with my heart beating on in time to another

There will be a time…

There Was A Time... (Part 1)

There Was A Time… (Part 1)

By

Nathan Caleb Camerer

There was a time when there was something about you

There was a sensitivity I’d never known in a person

There was a time when I dreamed of being a writer,

But I’m thinking of giving that up

It was Spring and the Cherry blossoms were jealous of you

The sun was shining

There were great bursts of leaves on the trees

A summer spent studying, sort of

Distracted by other entertaining activities

There was a time when you were The Golden Girl

You had a breathless warmth that flowed from you

It made an unspoken promise

A promise that there was no one else in the world you wanted to see

There was a time when I was paralyzed with happiness

I enjoy just looking at you

There was a time when there was a rumor floating around

A rumor of me marrying a girl from back East

It was a lie because I’m too poor

There was a time when I wasn’t cynical about everything

There was a time when the things I found precious, didn’t fade so fast

There was a time when I thought the bright things would come back,

But they do fade and they don’t come back

There was a time when I didn’t spend my nights reaching towards something

Something out in the dark that whispers on my fingertips

Looking for my Green light

Looking for my Brass ring

There was a time when writing brought me solace,

But not much to anyone else

It’s not very good,

It’s not read by very many people,

I should use it to start a fire

I write about anything

I write about whatever

I write about a memory, a thought, a place

There was a time when I was said to be good looking

There was a time when I thought you liked me,

But I’m not good enough

There was a time when you had a willingness in your heart

It burst out upon me like thunder and I could do anything because of it

Rich girls don’t marry poor boys though

There was a time when you were mine

There was a time when your smile was directed at me

That rare smile you only find a few times in life

It made me feel like you understand me

It made me feel like you believed in me

There was time when I thought I understood you

There was a time when I believed in you

There was time when every time I saw you it seemed like the first time

There was a time when all the mysteries and beauty in the world,

All the unanswered questions were nothing with you around

Nothing else mattered and anything could happen

There was a time when I was torn,

Asking myself if you loved me

5 years

There was a moment when I didn’t want to miss a single thing

You were my shimmering light

Struggling for five years

All that time lost

I saved your letters

I still have the first photo of you that you gave me

There was a time when I thought we’d never lose each other

There was a time when I never thought all that glorious love,

The glorious love between us,

Would ever turn into nothing

I just want to come home

I’m sitting here waiting and hoping,

Hoping that all my dreams of you come true

There was a time when I thought I would do everything on Earth with you

There was a time when I thought I had my whole life to be with you

There was a time when I thought it would always be like that

It could have been

We could have run away

Remember how much fun we had

We could have had fun like that forever

So far from that now

So hard to make you understand

Start over like it’s 5 years ago

It makes me sad that I can’t make you understand

There was a time when I thought you can’t repeat the past,

But of course you can

There was a time when I thought things could be fixed

Fixed just the way they were before,

But everything’s soo confused now

I talk about the past a lot,

Because there’s something I want to recover

I want to go back to the start

If I could do that then I could find the left turn we made

The turn that got me away from my vision of loving you,

That vision of me from 5 years ago

I never thought this would happen when I kissed you

There was a time when I thought I would be forever wed to you

My mind will never romp like the mind of God again

Falling in love with you changed my destiny

I let myself go

I screamed Geronimo and jumped off the cliff of sanity

There was a time when you seemed to blossom for me like a flower

There was a time…